How do you deal with uncomfortable emotion?

December 8th, 2017 by Tonya

Something really struck a chord on Day 3 of our last co-counselling training course. We had constructed an 'emotional wall map' and group members were plotting the various feelings we experienced, as individuals, along two axes of 'positive/negative emotion' and 'high/low intensity emotion' - and we labelled these feelings according to what felt authentic to us (it didn't have to fit into any other person's model of what a particular feeling was called) Read More...

Want to change the world? Change your consciousness.

November 8th, 2017 by Tonya

I've witnessed a lot of finger-pointing recently. You know, the kind of situation where one person, unwilling to face up to his own part in creating a particular situation, blames life/ 'the universe', the government, whoever for what is going on. It often stems, it would seem to me, from the person feeling vulnerable about - or powerless to change - something in her life - that she can't 'control' things around her Read More...

Do you allow yourself to fully feel?

November 8th, 2017 by Tonya

I'm having a run of transformational coaching clients who seem well-practised in the art of what we might call 'emotional numbing'. Because events in their past have been experienced as 'too traumatic' to truly feel, they have learnt to suppress authentic emotion. And this response has, over time, become so instantaneous - especially around key 'karmic' issues in their lives - that they find it hard to access the emotion at all Read More...

‘Why do you still teach co-counselling?’

September 18th, 2015 by Tonya

People sometimes ask me why I 'still teach co-counselling', with all the other workshops I offer, which are more of an overtly 'spiritual' bent, from The Mechanics of Spiritual Change to Finding Our Inner Light (starts later this autumn). They assume that, having 'done a lot of work on themselves' in the past - and considering themselves a way along on their personal evolutionary path - that learning co-counselling may be somehow 'too basic' for them Read More...

Touching the void

May 12th, 2015 by Tonya

Something really struck a chord on Day 3 of our co-counselling training course in London a few months back. We had constructed an 'emotional map' on the wall and we were plotting the various feelings we experienced, as individuals, along two axes of 'positive/negative emotion' and 'high/low intensity emotion' - and we labelled these feelings according to what felt authentic to us (it didn't have to fit into any other person's model of what a particular feeling was called) Read More...

A global network for inner change

August 22nd, 2012 by Tonya

Some of my coaching clients turn up at my door because they feel they're not 'in touch' with their emotions, would like to be - and simply don't know where to start. Often they've been suppressing their feelings all their lives, afraid that if they allow themselves to feel so-called 'negative' emotions like sadness, hurt, anger, fear and despair they will (more…)

Walking into the fire

June 4th, 2012 by Tonya

On the co-counselling course that I was running last week, the group asked me a question that really captured my imagination. We'd been doing some 'emotional training', accessing and exploring some core human emotions (fear, anger, sadness, joy...) and, to get a handle on these emotions and the subtleties that lay between them, we'd been using an 'emotional map' which I'd discovered a few days earlier in Gretchen Pyves' Co-Counselling Manual: 2nd Edition (1994) (which I've reproduced below) Read More...

Co-counselling course – a few places left

March 31st, 2012 by Tonya

A little nudge for those of you interested in co-counselling, there are a couple of places left on my five-day spring training, starting April 21st. I've been teaching co-counselling for years and would recommend it as highly now as when I started! Successful completion of this certificated course means you can set up reciprocal co-counselling sessions – for free, at any time you like – with anyone in the growing worldwide co-counselling network Read More...